What! Are you one of those “12 European Cities in 10 day type of people?” Don’t you get any vacation at all in the States? Take it easy, and don’t worry about seeing Copenhagen in 1-day.
I would suggest the 10-day version, allowing you to get drunk a few times, and still enjoy the next day with a True Scandinavian Hangover! Trust me, I’ve tried that more than once, but don’t let the next day scare you, while you are out on the Dance Floor, boogying to some singer, who you’ve never heard of with an equally foreign woman with her hand in your wallet!
I would suggest my tour Nr. 22 – The Red-Eye Tour of Copenhagen. We start easy with drinks at Nyhavn enjoying the Elephant ice-skating trials, then lunch at John Bull Pub where cheese and crackers go down nicely with Beer and Aquavit. Then we will stroll down the Pedestrian Street, Strøget with its Street Artists and shops that you can’t afford anyway.
I would remind you of the form, you signed at the beginning of the tour about urinating down those quaint alleyways, or on fountains along the way. Plains-clothed Policemen will be assisting you in that understanding to put their hands down in your wallets relieving you of DKr 1500 if caught doing something, you’ve promised me that you wouldn’t.
This trip might just get re-named to the “Hand down my wallet trip”, but let’s not be too hasty. Now it is time for Copenhagen by Night. At this juncture, I’ll be updating my head-count to see, how many of you have gotten lost along the way. If there still is over 50% of the original number in our group, we’ll take an unscheduled trip up the Round Tower, which affords nice views over the city.
For those of you who aren’t feeling a bit queasy looking at the sights, I’ll be pouring my special concoction of Aquavit+Beer+Aspirin to those, who don’t feel by that point in time, that their eyes are sufficiently red. The aspirin is included to help you cope with “The Day After” when you wake up in a Copenhagen Hotel next to an, as yet unknown Canadian, who you have proposed marriage to! That too is an undisclosed extra on this trip that I am offering at no additional cost!
After the Round Tower, we’ll be finishing off the trip near Trip Nr. 15 The Crooked Castle Trip. I feel that it is only natural for you to get a sneak preview of the next trip, allowing you to experience this otherwise Crooked Castle in its upright position ! Isn’t Alcohol wonderful like that?
Now we will be parting company, but rest assured that I will point you in the direction of the hotel and even provide a seeing-eye Tourist Guide for you to locate your room again, for a small additional cost.
Tomorrow, when the alarm clock is ringing and you wonder why you purchased my Red-Eye tour in the first place, you’ll be happy to know that you are not alone in your misery. How did I put this trip together, you might ask? Well, after a Trade Union Party, I was struck with the idea about, about. Why did I get this idea? I was standing outside waiting for, waiting for. Hm. I forget.
Wait a minute. Someone asked me outside the Convention Center, “Who is that Canadian woman, I saw you with?”
My reply was, “That was no Canadian Woman, that was my Danish wife!”.
And the rest is history……………….