The Dog Equation

You might remember Pythagoras? He was the one who made us suffer in school with index


a2 + b2 = c2

Some would say suffer, while others would say, such an invention of thought was both easy and useful.

That’s what makes us different.

I propose another line of mathematics: The Dog Equation. Here is the first application.

Dog + distance to bowl of cereal = Dog Satisfaction.

Variables contributing to success/failure include: distance from owner to bowl/dog, distance from dog to bowl, height of table.


The next equation deals with this photo: The Lick Factor


Variables contributing to success/failure include: reaction time of owner, amount of lickable utensils, elapsed time before door is shut

The third photo in the Dog Equation deals with: The Sniffability of Liver Pate.


Variables contributing to success/failure include: length of dog’s legs, distance of Liver Pate from tabletop to the edge – aka. The Dog Zone of Opportunity.

The other factor not as yet included is: The absence of owner due to blog-writing. This might just be the deciding factor determining the success/failure of attaining ones goals.

I’ll either have to raise the counter top to above dog-leg-level, or I’ll have to concentrate more on Dog Satisfaction!

I’ll be working on the next equation: Dog Satisfaction…I’ll get back to you on that one!






Author: notthedane56

My heathen tendencies are waiting to blossom at the Mid-Summer Evening in Denmark. In a Country that professes to have an overwhelming population of believers in the Christian Faith, I am always reassured by their pagan ways, at least one night per year. I won't be throwing myself on the bonfire, but I plan on being warmed by the thoughts of the fun-loving Danes, burning witches at the stake, while singing songs and drinking beer!

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