I realize using such questionable language so early in the day here in Denmark, shows bad breeding, and warrants a stiff reprimand, but sometimes I need to let off steam!
It’s just that with my yet so sleepy eyes, and thoughts of enjoying a day off from work, it seems so unfair, totally – if there are young people present, that the kitchen looks like a bomb exploded, perhaps from North Korea, scattering my cornflakes everywhere!
I’ve given up on the thought that my Children might have noticed that it was so, but then they too have their own agenda, which unfortunately doesn’t include giving my house a presentable look, in which any wayward guest, might just enjoy being here instead of wandering through the dishes, cups and whatnot discarded from the previous day.
It must be those Trade Unions, They are at fault here. I usually enjoy the fact that Denmark has a strong tradition of Union strengthened Work Ethics, ensuring good wages, safe work conditions, and solidarity within the confines of one’s place of work.
I might almost suspect that they have been organizing my home work force behind my back. Offering my employees everything and anything to entice them over to the other side. I am not one to deny them their rights, it just undermines my authority and makes the most simple task, almost impossible to carry out, without having to bend over backwards, thus catering to their every need.
Ireland has its Leprechauns, and I have the Danish Elves, of whom the visible Elves really should have left on the last train after the Christmas Holidays, but didn’t. We are not talking rainbows and gold here, just basic help around the house to decent wages.
I suspect part of the fault lies in the Harry Potter Conspiracy in which Hermione decides to organize the elves into Unions, thus create better working conditions for them. The Danish elves, however, have a known tradition for showing up in December, or October depending when the Christmas Decorations begin showing up in the Retail Sector, and working onward until Christmas is officially over. No questions asked, and just one known clause, no – not that Claus, which stipulates plenty of Rice Pudding, where and whenever it is called for!
That’s what I consider Fair Work Ethic! Rice Pudding and Guaranteed Employment in the Holiday Period.
The rest of the year, though, is the time of invisibility. The little presents disappear, as do the Elves. Now it is time for them to work, without being seen.
Do you see now where this blog has led us to? Unseen, Unpaid, Happy and Satisfied Elves!
They were not here last night, and that makes me sad. In the first few moments before I had to roll up my sleeves, and began to dismantle the kitchen mess, I thought of them. I then thought of the Trade Union Flyers that had been sloppily stuffed into the Trash Can, as well as the telltale signs of rice, scattered about the nooks and cyrannies of the kitchen, hinting at something else , than just poor kitchen habits.
My wife has accused me of not harboring the Spirit of Christmas. Embracing the Elves probably falls into that category as well. I guess it’s Payback Time now. The sins of the Father, have finally caught up with him, and now I have to Pay!
I must say though that I am very disappointed in my workers. I really thought they liked me, after all the time that we’d been together! Don’t those years count for anything? I guess not, but it is still the Unions which disappoint me the most.
No more complaining, it’s time to start work. Maybe, I should just wait 5 more minutes, and drink another cup of coffee, giving them time to show up for work.
After all, a good employer can easily accept lateness once in a while! I’ll just dock them in pay, and let bygones be bygones.
That’s the kind of Boss that I am! Fair and Just!